How often have you dressed in something because you felt you “had to”… you “should” dress like that because society or someone tells you too?
I know myself I have forced my pear shape figure into skinny jeans even when most jeans do not make me feel good (granted I now have a pair of snug high waisted Levis but I still feel more comfortable and confident in high waisted gym gear or a nice dress or even bellydance costumes can be comfier for me that jeans!).
And in recent times I have started to appreciate my pear shaped figure, my love of sparkles, gym gear and also how I like to make the most of my cleavage. I always tried to ‘fit in’ but actually we are all different and I always admire people who just dress themselves to make them feel-good!
For me, my clothes demonstrate my journey to self-acceptance. To not be afraid of who I am, be proud of the things I love about myself and also what I wear helps me to progress on this journey!
I also have an all or nothing personality (so no smart casual dress code here!), I am either in gym gear or in a sparkly dress or bellydance costume. I don’t feel confident in much else even though people may compliment me when I try to do the Gap model look… it is not me. I wish it was. But it isn’t.
Granted often in my contrast of interests (gym, outdoors, vlogging, bellydancing, modelling, and doing business), my outfits get confused where I am wearing gym gear with my dance show stage make up or outdoors wear with big blinging jewellery on. Yes I hiked up England’s tallest mountain and did Tough Mudder with liquid eyeliner on (I even made sure I had my waterproof liner on for the birth of my children… where there are people or photos… I love my liner!). Granted, I am not lycra clad at the gym but I will always have eye liner on even in my scruffs (although El Obsession has sorted that out for me so I am comfortable but look good).
That said, I have recently discovered lashes (pre lock down!) which meant I could be mostly make up free just with lashes and a tan.
However, it can be hard to find clothes and costumes to suit my style, embrace my curves and most of all make me feel good… and confident in my own skin.
Be Who You Are Not Who the World Wants You to Be
Until I found myself in a see-through white ball gown dress strutting my stuff down a catwalk with sparkly diamonds (Pugata Jewellery, hello!).
The dress was by Wake Bespoke (Jordan Wake) who was showcasing her tailor made clothing to suit all women regardless of shape, size or style… at the Simply Ladies Fashion Show in Leeds.
I loved the fact that she wasn’t afraid to go against the industry norms and if I wanted sparkles and cleavage and a figure hugging dress to suit my hips and boobs… that’s what I got (and some)!
I had been struggling with confidence and my self-esteem so I was scared to tell someone in the fashion industry that I knew little about the latest trends but I just knew what I like.
A year on, and I am more myself than ever and I now have so many Wake outfits for my dance shows and also for me (I’d say for nights out but I wear them at home too for a pick-me-up and if I am vlogging or doing photos that aren’t in gym wear).
So to kick off my theme of feel-good fashion I did an instagram live with Jordan Wake @wakebespoke who is also now a close friend of mine and an accountability partner too.
She said: “I dress women of all shapes, size, backgrounds and hang-ups.
“I like to help make a woman feel amazing in what they wear… they should not hcange themselves to suit any clothes, it is the clothes that need to compliment their confidence and personalities.”
Jordan herself is a big believer that women can wear anything or nothing as long as that woman is happy that is all that matters.
“I love seeing women transform from being shy to owning what they wear in mind and body.
“Often women I’ve style have had surgery or lost or gained weight and are scared to let me measure them in a fitting. But I am literally looking at the numbers and working out what will suit them, I am not bothered what the numbers are. It is about the woman and all of her!”
Amen to that! Wake Bespoke have also been running a fun challenging during lockdown 2020 (covid 19) encouraging clients to snap photos in their couture gowns whilst around the house!
And after listening to a talk by Mental Health Campaigner and Thrive Law owner Jodie Hill… the importance of getting dressed and putting on make up or doing a skincare regime can be an important part of self care especially during challenging times.
In a workshop I attended online through Wakefield Bondholders (who I am on the Board of Directors for) Jodie gave these top tips for other people working from home to help them feel-good and to boost productivity:
Jodie said: “The space we have to work at home can really impact our productivity.
“Have some where you can leave.” And she also stressed the power of video calls on a morning as a form of communication (rather than just emails).
She said: “So you can see each other but also on a morning, it means people get into a routine and get up and get dressed.
“People will remember how you made them feel at this time, not what systems you put in place.”
Jodie said that just small changes each day and getting fresh air and doing Yoga has helped her.
She said: ” It’s the compound effect of consistency.
“When we take care of ourselves it has a ripple of effect on everything.”
So I challenge you to get dresses tomorrow morning in something that makes you feel-good. And if you would normally do your hair and put on make-up, do that too.
I struggle to sit still and meditate but actually I often do that or pray or visualise my day from my dressing table.
Each week I am running a theme to help boost our mind and body – so I hope you can join me this week in feel-good fashion… What clothes make you feel good?
MIND AND BODY BOOSTERS – MY WEEKLY THEMES: Here’s what you can expect from me in coming weeks…
- Feel good fashion (this week chat to me on all social media @mamameiblog)
- Self-care daily
- Feel good fitness
- Wonder Women
- Positive Mindset
- Be You Beauty
- Taking Control
- Holistic therapies
- Body Confidence
- Being Authentic
- Let your soul shine (all things spiritual)