The great thing about routines and traditions is that we know where we stand. We know what is happening, what the order is and generally what to expect. 

But when our routines change or parts of traditions are forgotten or lost, it can make us feel even worse than if we had just gone with the flow.  

We all remember that first Christmas morning when we officially become grown-ups and there is no stocking under the tree for us!

So whilst I have had flexible routines with the kids at certain times of years such as Christmas, these are all having to change as they now live in two homes (half the week with their Dad and half the week with me).

It has been a hard adjustment from having the kids pretty much full time to just half of the time.

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Over summer I felt a sense of grief everytime I was on my own without the kids. I mourned what was, what had been. I felt an empty nest. I dwelled on all the little moments with the kids that I used to take for granted. I struggled to find a purpose again. I avoided seeing people doing the school run as much as possible. I dreaded events with other families. 

So this Christmas I am scrapping most of our traditions, so that I do not feel that sense of loss when I am doing things.

Granted, as I have the kids Christmas Eve and on Christmas morning we will be opening Christmas Eve boxes, setting out food and drink for Santa and then the next day we will do stockings and have a nice breakfast.

But as soon as my daughters wave farewell to go to their Dad’s for Christmas Dinner, the rest of Christmas Day and Boxing Day… everything will change.

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Here’s how I am celebrating Christmas differently:

• Making three Christmas Dinners for three lots of loved ones on different days.
• My daughters have asked for ToiletTwinning.org instead of gifts (they will get some gifts too though).
• Chinese Food, Steam Boat and Grill for Christmas Dinner!
• Climbing a Mountain on Boxing Day with my Step Dad (Scafell Pike)
• Instead of chilling watching TV and eating chocolate… I will be going to the gym, doing DIY and goal setting for New year’s Eve. As I have a lot resting on 2020!

HOW ARE YOU CELEBRATING CHRISTMAS? WHAT ARE YOUR TRADITIONS OR DO YOU PREFER TO GO WITH THE FLOW?